Comedy Night - Episode 1

In case anyone sees this site, which I highly doubt but in any case these videos are from a recent night thrown by some good friends who decided they wanted to do some stand up. Take a look at these they are incredibly funny. John Harnden, Matthew Deery, and broseph Sean Deery take the lead with the laughs. Music is by my good friends Those Damn Yankees! Enjoy!!

Comedy Night Part 1 from Derek Spencer on Vimeo.

Comedy Night Part 2 from Derek Spencer on Vimeo.

Gas Station Rants

I'm sure most of you are all aware of a certain gas station being brought back from the dead. For sake of said gas station I will not be naming names but again I'm sure you know which one I'm talking about.

Well I have a friend, who since the name change, has been all about this certain gas station. Below is a comment I posted on his Facebook. After I was done writing it I felt it was just to good to not post on here. Enjoy.

Facebook Post:

Dude you need to get your dick out of **** & ***** ass! That place is a joke. Seriously with the Facebook page and all give me a break. It doesn't even make sense. Its not broken english, it's just terrible english. Words are not even close to being spelled properly, periods in the middle of sentences, and not to mention the sentences make no sense at all! They try to talk about looking out for the big corporations. THERE IS A REASON THEY ARE BIG! People would rather shop there because ALL OF THEIR EQUIPMENT IS FUNCTIONAL! They don't sell you out dated milk and stale tobacco!

I also find it quite rude when the person ringing you up is doing nothing but talking on the phone. I mean really, how hard is it to say hello or how are you doing? In no other place would it be acceptable to have non-work related phone calls while you are with a customer. You don't go to restaurants and wait for your server to get off the phone to take your order. Its ridiculous. 

The guy openly admits to changing the name back to **** & **** to try to get its original customers back so they can make a profit. They even have signs saying under new management. How is being run by the same guy as **** ****** 2 new management? Moral of the story is its to late. The people who once shopped there are used to going to SA or Holiday. No ones going to go back to a place that they already have bad memories of no matter what its called. Yes, Im sure some people saw **** & **** and couldn't resist taking a look, but I highly doubt they continued going back. And before I hear from the naysayers with their "you're just racist" comments (which I've heard so many times before) I'm going to clear the air. My statements are in no way related to the race of the owners. Again I repeat this is 100% not about race!

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Agree or Disagree? Lets hear what you have to say...

Trying Something New

So at the risk of thoroughly embarrassing myself I decided that it was a good time to try to start writing. Don't ask me why, I was just compelled to do it. Actually the real reason was I was told to by the big guy himself. 

It gets very inappropriate at times so if that bothers you quit reading now.

It started out like any other day. The sun was shining. The birds were chirping. I was walking down the street minding my own business, when all of a sudden the sky opened up and lighting struck inches in front of my feet. As you can imagine I was like what the fuck is happening! The clouds, I shit you not started forming stairs that lead from the sky to my feet. Out of the opening at the top this old guy with a beard and a gold chains started walking towards me down the cloud stairs. 

Again it was a what the fuck moment! Dude makes it to the bottom and I said "Who the hell are you old man?". The man turns to me and says "Nigga please, ya kna who I am!". Dumbfounded I just continued to stare. "I'm the one and only G to the OD." I still have no idea who this old man thinks he is. "God motha fucka!" he said in a very ghettoesk voice. I know right? I was surprised too! Who would of thought God spoke ebonics! 

I'm not a firm believer in the "G to the OD" as he called himself, but holy shit he's standing right there in front of me. How can I not believe at this point! So I said to him" Okay G to the OD. Can I call you G to the OD?". He says "Sure thang nukka all my niggas call me dat".  Again with the ebonics, really what the hell. I thought he would be more socially acceptable than that. I cant take him to parties or out to a fancy restaurants. Maybe more of an all knowing intellectual sort of man. Nope! Wrong! He's straight out of fucking Compton. "Your niggas? Do you mean your angels?"

Heres how the rest of the conversation played out.

God: "Aight, aight enough with the pleasantries. I aint here to play peek-a-boo with you."

Derek: "Umm okay? Then what can I do for you G O D?"

God: "I needs you to do sumfin fo me. I needs you to go home and create a blog and write all of your chaotic nonsensical ramblings."

Derek: "Seriously? Why? I dont write. Plus no one gives a shit!"

God: "Nigga do you want me to strike you the fuck down?!"

Shit he didn't have to tell me twice. I said "Yes master. Thank you master. I'll get right on that master. Don't whip me again master". Here I am thinking slave days were over but apparently God, not liking the white devil feels he needs to make up for the treatment of his African brethren. HE WASNT EVEN BLACK!

So it is what it is. I went home and started a blog. Maybe it will turn out to be something. Maybe not. All I know is that mother fucker scares me and I dont want to see that chain wearing, ebonics speaking, man any time soon!